Priorities

You know that feeling when it seems like there is a surprise on its way? You have an inkling that people are throwing you a surprise party, but you don’t see any signs of it. But you have accidentally overheard some of the plans, but then everyone is acting all nonchalantly and you've maybe even  been invited to a “fancy” dinner, but no one has jumped out from behind the plants. Humph.

BUT…Wait for it… Wait for it… Wait for it…  I was watching a testimony of a woman that had PCOS and tried several attempts to conceive and even adopt. Finally she conceived naturally and was healed of all cysts. She said her desire to have a child had become an idol in her life, an obsession and she needed to right that. I remember a few years ago when I realized this was starting to happen with me and I was like TIME-OUT, whoa! No way am I letting this become an idol. God is my Number One. But I still think about it. I still pray about it. We still relentlessly pursue it and cry out for it. He is Number One, but we are petitioning for this thing.  Today I really wanted a word from God. He’s so faithful to clear my busy mind that is ever engaged in my schedule and things clamoring for my attention. I was praying over some things this morning and God kept bringing to mind how He cares way more about our obedience than our timing. How so many things take longer than necessary simply because we haven’t died to self in that area, we haven’t obeyed, we haven’t submitted.  NOT at all to say that we always go through seasons of waiting and/or hard times because of disobedience. Believers absolutely walking in obedience will still face trials that produce perseverance, which begets character and produces hope.  But, it’s a wonderful opportunity to get alone with God and ask Him not only to right the wrongs that have been done to us, but to right our hearts when going through it. What areas in my life and my heart, would you like to speak to, God? This morning I was brought to Leviticus 26. God was telling the Israelites the consequences of obedience VS disobedience. Pretty simple, obey and you’ll be blessed, disobey and not so much. Thank You, Jesus, that we live by grace and not by works, but obedience is still absolutely necessary if we want to see the fruit in our lives, if we want to see our land yield its crops, if we want to reap a harvest. Because He loves us too much to let us go the wrong way and because He wants to bless us. I’m so grateful that He widens the path before me, I’m so grateful that His love carries me. And that love has spoken into my heartbreak, into my concerns, into my pain and my doubts. “Keep Me your priority, and I will take care of the rest.” Ps. Robert spoke to a couple walking through infertility during our church’s presbytery services. He said “You’re gonna have a child. Just keep pursuing Him. Don’t let it consume you.” I knew this word was for us as well, because God has literally spoken those exact words to me. Normally, I really hate when people say “Don’t think about it and it will happen.” I just want to say um, that was easier the first couple of years, but we’re going on year 7, “not thinking about it” is not really an option. BUT I know their hearts are in the right place and there is some truth to it. He doesn’t ask us to push past our pain, He asks us to surrender our pain SO that we can continue onto the next leg. He doesn’t ask us to forget our God placed dreams and desires, He asks us submit them to Him. He wants us to keep petitioning. He wants us to activate the enduring hope we have in Jesus. He doesn’t want us to be paralyzed and wait till everything is just as we think it should be. He wants us to choose hope every day and surrender every single day. When we do this, our desires are in much better hands. This will help us to be relentless. We will command life within this barren land, we will take our authority over our situations and continue to trust His perfect timing, that He will be faithful. In Leviticus 26:4, He says, “ I will send you rain in its season, and the ground will yield its crops and the trees of the field their fruit.” And Vs. 9 says “I will look on you with favor and make you fruitful and increase your numbers…you will be eating last year’s harvest when you will have to move to make room for the new.” Today the Lord prompted me to feel. As I mentioned before God doesn’t ask us to push past our pain, He wants us to surrender it to Him. When these moments happen, I always cry. I know He catches every tear and replaces it with hope. The enemy would love for us to arduously dust ourselves off, put a band-aid on things and keep running. But God wants to remove the hindrances so that we can heal and move beyond our pain. He wants to redeem our pain. He wants us to take a time out so He can remind us that He sees us, remembers us, is thinking about us, is smiling down on us and is giddy with joy for all that He has for us. Today I surrendered more things in my heart and He is replacing them with more Truth. Today I cried out that God would use everything we have walked through to reach the masses. That our testimonies and future testimonies would touch lives and He would capture hearts through them. That those who might be thinking, “where is God? If He’s real, where is He?” will have the veil removed, chains broken and receive the enduring hope that we have. And today, although He loves that and wants that and I believe will absolutely honor that, He reminded me that He loves me more than those things. He reminded me that I’m His priority.

“There goes all my doubts
There goes all my pain
On that day You rose again
Sin no longer stains
There goes all my questioning
There goes all my fears
On that day of reckoning
Hope has reappeared” – Daniel Bashta